Childhood Value Series: #4 THE GOLDEN RULE

As mentioned in the last three blogs, this is a series on values that I learned growing up which I still keep to this day. This series is six blogs long. We are on childhood value #4: THE GOLDEN RULE. (In case you’re interested, #1 was INTEGRITY, #2 was DOING CHORES, and #3 was FINISH WHAT YOU START. You can read these in the Recent Posts section.)

So what is this “Golden” rule?

Here’s Wikipedia’s definition:

The Golden Rule is the principle of treating others as you want to be treated. It is a maxim that is found in most religions and cultures.[1] It can be considered an ethic of reciprocity in some religions, although different religions treat it differently.

The maxim may appear as a positive or negative injunction governing conduct:

* Treat others as you would like others to treat you (positive or directive form)

* Do not treat others in ways that you would not like to be treated (negative or prohibitive form)[1]

* What you wish upon others, you wish upon yourself (empathetic or responsive form)[1]

Two things jump out from Wikipedia’s definition for me: one, it is the principle of treating others the same way you want to be treated yourself, AND two, it is a maxim that exists in most religions and cultures.

Why is this important, you ask? Well, I think this is good to highlight because this makes this value even more applicable to everyone regardless of one’s religious or cultural background. Plainly said, if you want to be treated nicely, then make sure you treat people nicely. Another way to put it is, “What goes around, comes around.”

This was one of the often repeated maxims when I was growing up. I guess you can say that I was “a little terror” and a “spoiled brat” who went about wreaking havoc, if left to my own devices. Fortunately AND thankfully, I had parents who believed in disciplining me and teaching me the right things–the good ol’ GMRC (Good Manners and Right Conduct) Training.

I have heard embarrassing and “shocking” stories of how I was as a kid! My family members and very close family friends love to recount these to me, in love and in jest, on family get-togethers, when we travel down memory lane. And usually, after each recollection, the person telling the story ends it on an upbeat note: that he/she is happy that despite all that I put them through, I have turned out to be a decent grown up after all. Again, I credit my Dad, Mom, and family for teaching me the right things. I, certainly, wouldn’t be where I am today without their parenting, guidance, and support (Dad, those “beatings” paid off in the long run. 🙂)

With my 31-month-old son now in the picture, I fall back on these “horror” stories of how I was as a kid, and try to navigate the tricky waters of raising a strong-willed child. This value–the Golden Rule–will definitely be one of those things that we will teach him: “Be nice to Haru and Momo!” (when he tries to hit our dog or cat with one of his toy tools) OR “Wait for your turn!” (when he is on the slide at the toddler playground). Of course, we’ve now started with the “Please!” and “Thank you!”, and are happy that this is also reinforced by one of his favorites, Super Simple Songs.

Recently though, I have wondered whether the Golden Rule still applies today. It seems more and more people now share the same mindset as that in the Dilbert cartoon strip above OR uphold this other version of it: “Nice guys finish last!” (the nice guys being the ones who follow the Golden Rule and practice decency!) Here are some images I found while doing a Google search for “Nice guys finish last”:

Through the years, I have seen this mindset expressed in many ways and forms, but can be summed up to persons simply being rude, egotistical, self-absorbed, selfish, and being bullies! Another comic strip put it this way:

So what should I teach my son, amidst all of these negativity and distorted mindset?

It is this: “Treat others as you would like others to treat you!” But do not be a pushover, nor allow evil things to happen. Stand up for what is right! Fight for the truth! And truly make a difference in this world by living out the Golden Rule in your daily walk, and teaching this to others along the way.

Contrary to what these distorted minds think and declare through their actions and words, truth prevails! Good will win over evil! Light will dispel the darkness!

So go and treat others as you would like others to treat you!